Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Scary weekend, scary space (mine)

Reeling and tired. Adrenaline buzzed but mostly shell shocked.

These past few weeks have been anticipating, but without that pure wonder that makes anticipation normally giddy fun.

Scarier than that.

This one threaded with great fear - like venturing past chest-depth, knowing waves are breaking behind you, but rooted in place to make sure you catch the even bigger ones.

Except you're not all that confident you can.

You've never surfed and the expectation does nothing for the preparation, nor the wave itself.

Girl buys house upstate, must take up driving/buy car out of necessity (a necessity that eluded for 34 years), restarts an antique shop (last run in India 5 years back).

And the gods move all the little pieces so that they converge on one weekend (thought set in motion at non-converging times), a perfect storm of personal upheavals, and each with individual attention that - when the day itself for each comes, cannot be devoted to any one because:

They're all happening at once.

Voila WAVE. I got caught, under.

And now own a house, run a small store, seek a car and, meantime, rent.

C – tossed under.

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